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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”& u1 }* i0 N& [9 e
, p( N! l1 b' S# c3 u2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”+ O2 A1 A. m+ @, C
7 c5 L9 a- g0 A1 |
男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”4 t/ l: V, d, @2 X6 Q! l
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。' b6 C9 A8 `7 F x1 a
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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, ~" Y6 j5 h* \9 n' _女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。( H" l' Z/ |! z0 G& w& r- {
- v/ @2 v, M0 ]% G7 n# ~笑死我了。。。0 d- i! v0 Y$ f+ O
9 w R3 F4 e/ W/ w4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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* _7 P6 m8 a- S+ P1 S, g) h我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!1 n* J* y/ S- \! S. y) X6 T
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”9 k' W/ E7 E5 Y9 S. F
% s4 H. P. V6 Q! F) b G# _# l
恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
6 A. j# c# E5 |; E: ?7 C3 n- v( D" E* y. E7 R& P6 ^3 ~; \+ s% [
就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”. x, z9 f6 o& w
1 Y4 v8 I' g& g$ i' e1 V, G) w2 q孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…3 g7 s8 x8 E+ L+ f$ A p) ~
! m$ W. B I( c$ a. v5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
' ^- q: w9 b! a2 d
* p3 g$ [) j4 B0 w$ v3 _0 h- W我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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3 P8 a7 o9 e* M% C一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。" C# l3 G: t5 V
3 V: X& c. r' A当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。
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. d# u0 o8 ?5 J- S* k- S6 {7 w女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？0 O7 v3 `; G C, r6 R$ J7 W; P+ V. ~
! m; ~8 J2 b. R% H& e$ w我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…; h& m9 S. r6 L) V4 {5 P
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当前离线
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