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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”7 O, i/ ]+ c( V9 }
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”: t- s/ n: s4 [3 `
$ z- k1 U( c X! x$ O3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。# X% Z. G& j9 n
" L8 S6 K. R- H& @/ c笑死我了。。。
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，: d4 x+ B i- u6 ?5 u3 V4 r
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，2 n& |# u' Z s
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!, }+ z. g0 X0 P
+ W! }$ Z8 u9 k( {6 M* Q: v2 e她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!& k' q* K' f v& M, R, ]0 @
! s4 B0 {/ k/ J1 E$ F晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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* b$ v3 }5 c7 t$ S1 x! K; ^恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，4 N4 `4 S7 G) K$ ]$ y- |% V
( k; o% x2 s" m2 [1 w5 o就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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2 }2 l- v' v1 [) G& E1 L& U孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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* l: G8 ]/ H# I& V" l1 {! }( a5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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5 n# \' p$ Q9 g% \2 e% w我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！) }5 @: u9 W2 I9 O8 s
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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$ v2 T" P9 R" Y3 ~; T1 o2 L当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？# B, Q1 k' Z6 f2 l2 v4 G
9 a: r2 k$ H& ] A我，无业闲人一个。5 @5 Y& N6 z i. s+ C( \& E) f8 P
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？) r! S! x$ H4 R3 a3 X
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。6 {1 e6 ^3 O3 {3 A
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…9 s# d& \) {4 A
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当前离线
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